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21 Year Old Virgin by Mikael
April 25, 2010, 1:44 pm
Filed under: A Little Me, Health, Relationships, Sessual Side, Try

Largely inspired by this past weeks episode of Glee featuring the music of Madonna.  Venturing into more adult topics–be warned.

Whenever I tell someone that I’m a virgin, the reaction is generally the same.  Shock.  About 98% of the time, people are really impressed and respect the fact that I haven’t given it up yet.  I’ve heard the word “amazing” a few times too… But I also get other exclamations.

“But you’re not Mormon!” (living in Utah, it’s assumed that you only have sex after marriage… unless you’re not Mormon then you start early… it’s a weird assumption); “But you’re hot!” & “How have you held out that long?” are common statements that generally follow my confession among others.  Here are my rebuttals–

~ I don’t have to be a Mormon/religious to have morals and high standards for myself.

~ Being good looking doesn’t automatically mean an active sex life.

~ And I’ve held out this long because–

  • I want to be ready. I’ll know when I am.  I trust myself before I trust anyone else.
  • I want to care about and trust the person I’m with (aka–are they clean?!)
  • I’m afraid that once I start, I won’t be able to stop. That is a valid fear. Haha!
  • Believe it or not, the one time I thought I was ready, the guy said no. (Waiting for marriage is a bullshit response in my book–largely because I know way too many people who’ll get married just to have sex. No offense.)
  • And lastly, I’m terrified to risk becoming pregnant this young. I’m thoroughly convinced that my body is one of those that will get pregnant just because of my abnormally strong subconscious urge to procreate.   I just can’t have a child any time soon. Ask me again in 5 years.

Here’s the weirdest thing though… I don’t regard the big V as something of huge importance.  Everyone makes it out to be this big deal (thus the wait for marriage recommendations), but I don’t feel that it is.  In fact, I’m looking forward to having sex… Though I do want to be smart about it–that’s all!  You know, making sure your partner is clean, using birth control, and not sleeping around.  The good stuff.

I just know for a fact that I cannot wait until marriage to have sex.  Who knows if I’ll ever get married anyways!  But you know the saying–Test drive the car before you buy it?  I’m a firm believer in that even though most of my family would probably end up in respiratory failure if they found out my thoughts on this.  If the sexual chemistry isn’t there, it won’t last.  Yes, that’s shallow but it’s completely true for most couples.

Think about it–could you be with someone for the rest of your life if you knew the sex just wasn’t there?  I can tell already that I’m going to have a hearty “appetite” so I don’t think I could.  My guy will need to be able to keep up with me! :P

What are your thoughts on the big V?

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